A Poem for Jeffrey's 26th Birthday

in celebration of our youngest son

to listen to the poem (and Bonnie snoring very loudly in the background):

you told me you dreamed about your grandfather
he played the guitar and smiled
at you. you felt happy to see
him again—for him to see
you, the man you are growing
into

you awakened flushed
with gentle joy
but empty, holding
that dream:

if he could see you now

if he could see you now (and I’m
not ruling it out) he would see

the man-boy he always knew—
the one he bounced on his knee,
who dimples when he smiles, loves
a story or a song, always
ready for adventure and something
sweet on the tongue, who whispers
sugar into the ears of dogs
and cats and any creature who
will listen

if he could see you now he
would see that heart on
your sleeve. he would touch
it softly, cup it in his hands
and keep it warm

if he could see you now he
would say, remember how,
near the end, you were the only one
I would listen to? how I remembered
myself when I was with you?

he loved you so.

I have a picture of you
with your father and grandfather
on your dad’s birthday, the last
one Papa saw—how could
we know? you are leaning
into your dad—goofy—and all three
sets of eyes brim love

if he could see you now,
the haze of time a shy, soft light
he would say,

you come from these:

quick temper, love of laughter, no
suffering of fools, soft heart
for the hurting and the
furred ones, a mind and hands
that create, seeker of beauty, fear
you will never be enough, fear
you are too much, giver, giver,
giver

and taker

you come from all of this
but you are also so much more
and I am so proud of you

if only he could see you now
as I see you now—that same
beautiful boy, all grown up

love knows no now
love knows no then
love is timeless and love
sees

you are seen, you are seen,
you are seen, sweet, beautiful
heart. happy birthday, dear
son, dear grandson, dear
one.

you are so loved